Mending Hearts

I’m convinced that God really does order our steps, and that there are no such things as coincidences. Sometimes He even uses Facebook to prove it! LOL.

Months ago, I found myself inviting people to like Heroic Inspirations’ Facebook page. I came across a name and quickly scrolled by it. Why did I scroll by it? Well, it was that of my dad. Immediately, I felt my stomach do some loops as questions filled my head.

“Should I invite him?”

“Will he actually accept?”

“How will he feel if he reads some of these posts that are about him?”

I skipped over him thinking he may get offended by a few of the posts, which has never been the intention for any of my posts. They’re simply a part of my personal journey that I hope inspires others on theirs.

Then something urged me to scroll back up and invite him. As I hesitantly clicked on the invite button beside his name, a peaceful feeling overcame me.

Looking back at the situation, a part of me wanted him to accept the invitation. Especially since he began communicating through messenger with small talk here and there. Maybe by accepting the invitation, it meant he could see the matters of my heart. Better yet, I didn’t have to verbalize them to him. But I didn’t want to get my hopes up.

Fast-forward to the end of January – I wrote an open letter called Dear Younger Me, which I was kinda hesitant to post. For one, it was completely out of my comfort zone. And two, it required me to dig really deep in order to start understanding myself. But what I didn’t realize was God had another plan.

It was a setup! It was the gateway to start the healing process of the hole in my heart.

That Monday I posted the blog as usual. Afterwards, something unsuspecting happened. Right before I headed to my counseling session I got a Facebook notification. My dad accepted the request AND liked the page. At that moment I knew God was up to something. Boy, was I right!

I predicted he would call and shared that with my counselor. Voilà…the next day he did and said we needed to sit down and talk. He expressed how he’s always loved me but needed to share some things with me.

The thought of verbalizing my feelings to anyone is always nerve-racking. I hate conflict. So how was I going to talk to my dad? Was I going to play the blame game or show love like Christ does daily? I went with the latter and actually extended the olive branch, inviting him to my counseling session.

My only hope for this session was to learn about the other half of my DNA. I needed that so I could understand me. But, the conversation we had changed my whole perspective of him. It showed me that we are the same.

You might be wondering, how is that? Well, we share the same hole in our heart. His dad wasn’t around like that either. We just tried to fill our holes with different things.

Opening my heart to my dad, even though it’s been previously broken, has created a space to evoke some healing for both of us. Neither one of us can change the life events that created those holes but we can work towards closing them through healing.

I don’t know what the future holds for us but I know God has orchestrated the recent events for a purpose. So either way the chips may fall, I’m willing to go through the process to get the healing I’m finally admitting I need. Even more so because I know God is with me.