Uncovering False Validation

Seeking validation is the same as saying, “Tell me who I am! Tell me what I’m worth!”

Out of nowhere, I’m sitting on the couch contemplating what to write when a miracle happened – my toddler, Mia, asked for broccoli!

Some of you are probably reading this like, “Ummm okay, what’s the big deal?” Well, this kid HATES anything green except for sweet peas. I wish you could’ve seen me jumping up to fulfill her request before she changed her mind!

But as soon as she saw the broccoli, she wasn’t having it. Until she heard this: “You can tell your friends tomorrow you ate your broccoli and they will be so proud of you!”

She proceeded to eat the green veggie with a smile and a sense of pride.

Looking at this situation made me question, why is it that we’re hesitant to move forward in life unless we have the validation of others?

Speaking from personal experience, it boils down to a lack of faith. Believe me, it’s easier to look to tangible things (people, accolades, money, titles, etc.) than trust in an intangible and invisible God, even though He is very much present.

See, we search out these things to provide us with a sense of:

• Self-confidence,
• Acceptance (check out “Accepted, Not Rejected”),
• Worth, and
• Identity.

Yet we obtain them, feeling complete only for a short while until the emptiness comes back. Finding ourselves chasing something that will never complete us.

But if we shift our mindset we can overcome the addiction of seeking validation in the wrong places. We just need to remember that:

1. God should always be the first place we seek validation
2. Seeking validation from insignificant sources is a bondage trap
3. How we view ourselves and our situations can change our outcomes

Now, let’s keep it real, we’ve ALL looked to things we shouldn’t have when we’ve sought to be validated. Whether it’s been attention from a person (especially one that doesn’t matter!), or something on our laundry list of unhealthy acts. We’ve all been there. But once we find our worth – in God – we’ll never fall for false validation again.